These are days of prayer. Daily I am more amazed by and more in love with our little Michael. When he eats, when he sleeps, when he looks around at the world, when he "talks" to us my heart involuntarily breaks into prayer. Prayers of thanksgiving, prayers for his future, prayers for his protection, prayers that Tim and I will raise him to know and honor the Lord. It's overwhelming, the love and responsibility I feel for this little creature. My heart is full and, more than it has in many years, clinging to God for dear life. My son needs His love and protection. So do I.
I'm praying and clinging for other reasons too. Namely my brother, his wife, and their daughter Maggie. Maggie was born two weeks ago, proved her doctors wrong and fought through a natural birth, came through surgery, and in spite of many health issues has been gaining weight over the last week or so. It's not all good news, though. In fact, every day is a roller coaster of emotions for this family and all of us who love them. There is no way to know how this will all play out. We hope and pray for the best. For God's will to be done. (My brother tells the story the way only a parent telling the story from the inside can. And with eloquence, honesty, and faith. Remarkable.)
There is no neat way to tie up a post like this. There's no specific point, and anyway it's not a tidy subject, faith. This is just another form of prayer for me. I'm putting my thoughts down in print to my Lord, and to myself. Maybe some time in the future when my memories have blurred I will come across this old post and my heart will be softened and I will be prayerful again.
For now I'm praying prayers of inexpressible gratitude. The Lord of heaven and earth knows us, and hears us, and holds us all in His hands. His wisdom will prevail. I thank God for that with all my heart.